10. Eat Better—Loving friends and family assume that any illness is related to your poor eating habits, while they let their own veggies rot in the fridge and sip their mocha frappuchinos.

9. Embrace Religion—If you invest in your spiritual life your legs will begin to work again. All illness can be healed with prayer. (Although many believe this to be true, not everyone who prays is healed- proven by me.)

8. Chalk It Up to Bad Cramps—You’re 29, but you’re just having a bout of bad cramps and don’t realize it, because you’ve only been dealing with cramping every month for the past fifteen years. This can be replaced with "growing pains", menopause , stress, or any other excuse that comes to mind.

7. Take More Zoloft—Everything can be cured with more anti-depressants! If you are happy, you won't notice the pain.

6. Research Online—Your illness is out there, you just have to find it, but when you think you’ve found it, your doctor won’t believe you because you found it online.

5. Find a Psychological Cause—Ever wonder how all illness is related to past trauma of which you have no recollection?

4. Sit Tight for Ten Years—Doctors may take a decade to find the cause of your illness, so just sit tight and don’t bother them.

3. Join e-harmony.com—You’re sick because you don’t have a boyfriend, and that loneliness is manifesting itself in your legs which prevent you from dancing, from dating, or from leaving your couch.

2. Drink Alcohol— A psychiatrist says, “The first rule of thumb is, don’t do anything that will harm you, and since alcohol won’t harm you, you might as well see if it helps you.”

1. See if It Goes Away on Its Own—You’ve had this pretty steadily for about a year now, but let’s just see if it goes away tomorrow and never comes back. We can always hope!

Submitted by Shannon Luders-Manuel copyright 2006. butyoudontlooksick.com